At this point, everything I touch falls apart, and I just continue to let me shit for a life wreck others people. I tore the person I loved dearly with all my heart apart into little pieces and committed the crimes of cheating and lying which I said I would never do. Now, they wish that life itself were over like myself. The girl I began to grow close with through all the drama and emotional turmoil is now seeking counseling. I know she has her own stuff going on and at this point I believe I just pushed that over the edge as well. I've wiped out my family's saving, and they are praying that I become something worth a damn.
Everyone does better when I'm not around, and at this point even I do not want to be around anyone as all I do is rip their world apart, and struggle to simply have food, shelter, and live another day. What's the point of it all at this point? Seriously, I am beginning to believe that I'm better off sitting here alone, and with nothing so that way I cannot have a negative impact on anyone but myself.
God I can't wait to see my shrink again.
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